


Solving Problems

by AngelsDemonsandMischief



Category: Supernatural
Genre: A little bit of everything, Caring Dean, Depressed Castiel, Eventual Smut, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Kinda a Casefic, Love Confessions, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-17
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-02-25 17:17:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2629913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelsDemonsandMischief/pseuds/AngelsDemonsandMischief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fresh out of Purgatory, Dean notices something off about Castiel. Worried about him, Dean decides to confront him and everything seems to go well, for a while. But after a tough case, Cas just pushes away even more. Can Dean figure out a way to save Cas from himself?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Blame

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so, the first chapter of this story is kind of a retelling of Cas' feelings towards Purgatory. But I will say that Dean is a little more emotionally stable in this fic but for its purposes it's necessary. Dean still has his issues and they will come up in later chapters but this is where we are at for now. This is going to be the only chapter that is canon-related so bare with me. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it! Please, please, please leave me some feedback! I'd really appreciate it!

Ever since Cas came back Dean Winchester felt like something was off. When he saw him for the first time he couldn’t be more relieved. Purgatory had been one son of a bitch and he felt terrible that he couldn’t get Cas out of there. He tried everything he could but nothing he did worked. Truth be told, he was having a hard time accepting the fact that'd he would never see him again. He was drinking a lot, well, more than usual. Even Sam was starting to notice something was wrong. When he had asked Dean about it he just shrugged it off, insisting he was okay.

Then, one day out of the blue, there he was, standing in the dirty motel. He still had the scruff from Purgatory. He was dirty and his clothes were torn. Even his eyes, which normally shone a bright blue, had seemed to dim. Dean couldn’t believe his eyes. After a few minutes, Dean had finally processed that Cas was actually standing there. He ran to him and pulled him into a bear hug, like the one he had given him when he had found him in Purgatory. And that was that. Dean and Sam took Cas in. He had been traveling around the country with them, ever since. But he wasn’t the same. Cas was quiet, more than usual. He didn’t talk about anything other than whatever case they were working on. No matter how many times Dean had tried to talk to him, he only ever got one or two words out of him. Dean had brought it up to Sam but he just waved it off and said he was crazy, that Cas was fine. In all honesty, it was really starting to bother him. Since Cas came back the brightness in his eyes still hadn’t returned. He still was acting distant. Dean had had enough of it one night and when Sam had gone out to grab some food, he confronted Cas.

“Hey Cas, buddy, can we talk?” asked Dean.

“Of course Dean. What is wrong?” replied Cas walking over to where Dean was sitting on the bed.

“Nothing is wrong with me Cas. It’s you I’m worried about.”

“Why are you worried about me Dean? I can assure you I’m fine.”

“Bullshit Cas. Sam may think you’re fine and dandy but I know you better. Profound bond and whatnot. You’re not okay.” Cas didn’t say anything. He just looked at Dean through squinted eyes. “Come on Cas. You have to talk to me. I know what Purgatory was like remember? I was there! Are you angry with me for not being able to get you out?” he asked. He hoped that Cas would say no, that he wasn't angry with him, but he just didn't know. He couldn't be sure.

Cas tilted his head to the side and said, “You think I am angry with you Dean?”

“At this point Cas, it’s the only thing that makes sense,” Dean said shaking his head.

Castiel sat down next to Dean on the bed. He placed his hand on his shoulder and looked at him for a minute.

“Dean, I am not angry with you.” He sighed a breath of relief and looked down at Cas’ hand. It was placed on his shoulder.

“Then what is the matter with you, Cas? Talk to me,” Dean pleaded, searching his eyes for some sort of clue. He found nothing.

“Dean -” Cas started but Sam kicking the door open cut him off. His arms were full with bags of food. He walked over to the table and set everything down without looking at the two.

“Oh, uh, hey guys,” Sam said awkwardly finally looking over to them.

“Hello Sam," he paused. "Dean you should eat something,” said Cas changing the subject.

Dean looked at Cas, annoyed that he was dodging his questions. He didn’t care if God himself was in the room. He wanted answers and he wasn't going to wait forever for them.

“We are not done talking about this Cas,” said Dean, grabbing a burger from one of the bags.

“Okay, Dean,” replied Cas quietly.

Later that night, Dean drove around the small town after Sam had fallen asleep. They weren’t currently working on a case and he got antsy if he was in one place for too long. Trying to find something to keep his mind busy, he turned on some music. He left Sam a note so if he woke up he wouldn’t be worried if he was gone. Twenty minutes into his drive there was a familiar ruffling of wings. Castiel was suddenly sat in the passenger seat.

“Hello, Dean,” he said looking out onto the road. Dean jumped in his seat and looked over to Cas.

“Dammit Cas, give a dude a warning.”

“Sorry,” he said quietly.

“It’s fine just...What do you want?” Dean asked looking back to the road.

“To finish our conversation from earlier. You said we weren’t finished.” Dean sighed and found the nearest empty parking lot. He parked the Impala and they both got out. Walking to the front, Dean ran a hand through his short hair.

“Yeah Cas,” he said sitting on the hood. “I want to know what the hell happened to you.” He looked up at Cas who was standing next to him.

“Nothing happened to me Dean,” said Cas looking down at his body.

“That’s not what I meant. Cas, I tried everything I could to get you outta there. Everything. We finally got to that portal. After a year of trying, and you just…” he stopped and took a deep breath. This was hard for him to talk about. Dean was never good at this sort of thing, but he was willing to push aside his comfort to help Cas.

“Dean -”

“No Cas, I felt awful leaving you there. I wished everyday that there was something more I could have done to get you out.”

“You didn’t leave me there Dean,” Cas said solemnly.

“What are you talking about man? I know what happened, I couldn’t get you out.”

“Dean,” Cas said again, walking up to him. He touched him lightly on the forehead. Suddenly, Dean remembered everything. He remember what actually happened.

“I didn’t leave you? Are you fucking stupid Cas? I could’ve gotten you out of there and you pushed me away? What the hell were you thinking?” Dean yelled.

“I didn’t want to leave Dean! I deserved to stay there! After all I did, after the death and destruction I caused, I deserved to suffer!” Cas yelled back, eyebrows furrowed.

“How many times have you told me that I had good intentions whenever I fucked up Cas? You were trying to do the right thing. You’re a good guy Cas,” said Dean, trying to calm himself down.

“If I am such a good guy Dean, then why do I feel so bad?” asked Cas, hanging his head.

Dean stood up and put his hands on Cas’ shoulders. “Look, Cas, anyone in that situation would feel bad. People died and that sucks. But you can’t go around blaming yourself for every little person that dies. It’s not healthy man.”

“I am and angel of the Lord Dean. Who else is going to protect humans if I don’t do it?”

Dean let his hands fall to his sides. How was he going to get through to him? Dean hated seeing Cas this way.

"If God wanted us humans alive, happy, and healthy, he wouldn’t have ditched earth. He wouldn't have let us rot. Would he?"

“Dean…”

“No, Cas. I’m serious. It is not your job to protect everyone. Angels, humans, it doesn’t matter. You’re not God! If He wants to fix his mess then let him deal with it.”

"You're one to talk Dean. How many times have you risked everything to save a human? If I have nothing to be blamed for Dean then neither do you."

"Well, then maybe we're both a couple of dumbasses," Dean said. "Look Cas, the point I am trying to make here is that in our world, things get pretty shitty. We make bad choices, but that doesn't mean we are bad people. There are just some things we can't control. We have to deal with the hand we are dealt and sometimes that sucks. But Cas, I know you are a good person. I know you wouldn't do something unless you thought it was the right thing." He stood there for a few minutes waiting for a response. He didn't know where that came from. It wasn't often that Dean spoke his mind. Crowley would be ice skating in the Pit before Dean ever had this conversation. Dean let his gaze drop and sighed when he realized Cas wasn't going to respond.

“Come on man. It’s late. I need my four hours,” Dean said walking back to driver’s side door. Cas followed his lead and sat in the passenger seat. The drive back to the motel was quiet. Dean kept glancing over at Castiel. He was just sitting there starting out the window. He couldn't read the expression on his face and that frustrated him. Still, he figured he pushed him enough for tonight and decided not to say anything. A few minutes later they pulled into the motel's parking lot.

“Goodnight Dean,” Cas said as they got out of the car.

“See ya Cas. And hey,” he paused, grabbing Cas by the shoulder, “Go easy on yourself. This isn’t your fault. I’ll see ya tomorrow. Okay?”

"Of course, Dean," Cas replied. And with that, Dean walked inside the motel room and passed out on the bed.


	2. The Ever Powerful Eagles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally finding a new case, Sam and Dean find themselves in a small town in Oklahoma. Too tired from a long drive, the boys and their angel surrender to pull of relaxation and movies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I totally wasn't expecting to post this chapter until the end of the week but life, or lack there of, happens and well, here ya go. Enjoy a taste of a semi-domestic day in the lives Sam, Dean, and Castiel. The next chapter will be more about their new case and figuring out what the monster is so that's where we are headed. Also, don't get your hopes up that Cas is a-okay. Fair warning. Okay, enjoy!

Dean woke up the next morning to the smell of coffee. This wasn’t unusual for mornings when the boys didn’t have a case. Sam would get up way to early friggin early, according to Dean. He would take a run, and then bring back some coffee. Dean lay in his bed for ten minutes, shaking off sleep, before he actually sat up. Rubbing his eyes, Dean got out of bed and stomped into the tiny kitchenette. He was not a morning person. He couldn't function without two cups of coffee in his system. Sam was bouncing like a puppy, completely energized. He slid Dean his cup of coffee across the table carefully. He knew how Dean was in the mornings.

After Dean finished his cup, he looked around the room. Weird. Cas was usually around in the mornings. It unnerved him a bit when Cas wasn’t there. He was so used to him hanging around that whenever he wasn’t there Dean felt a little anxious.

“Hey Sammy, you seen Cas?” he asked, voice still thick from sleep.

“He’s your angel, dude. I don’t know what he does every moment of the day.”

“He’s not…shut up!” Dean exclaimed defensive, his face going red. He hoped Sam didn’t notice. He did.

“Okay. Whatever you say Dean,” Sam chuckled. Sam didn’t comment on the ever-darkening shade of red his face was turning. Instead he changed the subject. “So get this, I was doing some research this morning and I think I found a case.” Sam walked around the counter to sit next to Dean with his laptop. He pulled up a few news articles and let Dean read them. “Two teenage girls, 17, went missing from a town in Oklahoma. I think we should go check it out.” Dean finished reading the article before he looked up at Sam.

“Yeah, man if you think we should,” he said rubbing the back of his neck. “And hey look Sammy, if Cas ever decides to show his wings around here today, go easy on him. Alright?”

“What do you mean?”

“We may have, you know, talked. Last night,” he said wincing.

“Talked? You mean like talk talked?”

“Yes Sammy. Total chick flick, gross, moment. I don’t want to talk about it.” Sam smirked over his coffee.

“Well, is he, like, okay?” he asked after a few moments.

“Yeah. He’ll be okay, man. He has got to be the most emotional angel in the history of like, ever. The last thing we need is a riled up, over emotional smiting machine on our hands. Just try not to push him okay?”

“Whatever you say Dean,” Sam shrugged.

This whole “talking about you feelings” crap was starting to annoy Dean. He hoped this wasn't going to become a regular thing. If it was he was going to have to start buying bras for when he started sprouting boobs and a vagina.

The rest of the morning was spent packing up for the road trip to Oklahoma. Dean tried to keep his mind on the case. Figuring out what was happening to the girls there was important. But no matter how hard he tried, he kept drifting back to Cas. He was concerned about him after their conversation last night. He hoped he wasn’t off doing something incredibly stupid like getting himself hurt. Cas did have a history of ditching them in the past. But, ever since he got back from Purgatory, it was unusual for him to be gone for more than a few hours. So, when Cas didn’t pop in all morning Dean was starting to get worried. He kept trying not to think about it and focus on driving. But as the hours ticked by, he got more and more restless. After about four hours of driving, Sam and Dean switched seats so Dean could rest his eyes. That idea didn’t last long and he pulled out his cell phone to check for any messages from Cas. There were none. He curses the day they ever got him the damned thing. He never used it anyway.

Another hour of driving passed and Dean finally typed out a text to Castiel.

 _hey man, u ok?_ He hit send so he wouldn’t change his mind.

 _Yes, Dean. I am fine._ He got back only a few minutes later. That gut wrenching feeling in the pit of his stomach eased. He typed back a reply not soon after.

_ok. you didn’t pop in today. i got worried._

Castiel didn’t text back after that. Twenty minutes later Dean was sending him another text.

 _found another case. headed to oklahoma right now_. He just wanted to tell Cas where they were if he decided to pop in at the last motel and they weren’t there. He didn’t expect him actually show up in the car.

“Hello Dean,” he said from the backseat. Dean jumped in his seat, sighing when he realized who it was.

“Cas. We’ve talked about this. No popping in places without a warning okay?” Dean said through gritted teeth.

“I’m sorry Dean, but you said you found a case. So I came.”

“Actually, I found the case, Cas. And it’s okay. We could use your help,” Sam said looking back in the rearview mirror. Dean glared at Sam and crossed his arms in frustration.

“What’s going on?” Cas asked Sam. They dove into a long discussion about the case. They talked about what they thought was kidnapping girls and why. Dean sat in the passenger seat, pouting, not putting any two-sense into the conversation.

Upon arriving in Cedar Crest, Oklahoma the boys found the most discrete motel possible. They had gotten to the motel around 3 in the afternoon. They had decided that they were going to wait until the next day to do any investigating. They were too tired from the hours spent driving. Which meant that Dean had sit around and go stir-crazy. Much to Dean’s surprise, Cas decided to stick around the rest of the day. He couldn’t help but notice that he was in a better mood than he had ever seen him in a long time. He was talking more, engaging in conversation, doing some research with Sam. He was generally in a happy mood. Which in turn made Dean happy. He was glad that he wasn’t moping around anymore. Maybe their talk had some effect on him. Maybe 'talking about your feelings' wasn’t such a bad idea after all. He laughed at the thought.

Around 5 o’clock that night, Dean had had enough of sitting around doing nothing. He decided he was going to take it upon himself to educate Cas in all things human. He was sick of him never understanding his references. And besides, watching a movie or two never hurt anyone. It wasn't like he wanted to see Cas' face light up when he finally understood some of his jokes. It wasn't that at all.

“Hey Sammy, Cas, take a break from your research. Let’s watch a movie.”

“Dean, don’t you think we need to know as much as we can before we go tomorrow?” Sam asked, cautious. Dean grunted.

“Sammy, you’re smart, but I cannot focus on anything right now. Cas hasn’t seen any good movies since he’s been here and it’s my job to educate him. Besides, there isn’t much you can research anyway until we talk to the police. Chill out, grab a beer, and come enjoy the simple things Sammy.”

“I agree with Dean, Sam. Perhaps we should take a break,” said Cas glancing at Dean. The look was unusual on Cas' face and Dean couldn't quite place what it was. Sam pulled a major bitchface, but seeing as he was overruled, he closed the laptop. He walked over and threw himself into the armchair. He didn’t know what had gotten into his brother, but Sam decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth. He left the only other empty seat next to Dean on the couch. Dean cast a glare back towards Sam who had a look of pure amusement on his face. Cas sat down on the two-seater next to Dean, there knees just barely touching. Dean tried not to think about the surge of heat when Cas’ leg hit his but he just couldn’t stop. He coughed uncomfortably and, out of habit, he swears, leaned into the touch. When Cas looked over to Dean, he quickly looked away. He pressing play on the remote and focused hard on what the screen what showing.

One and a half Lord of the Rings movies later, Dean yawned and stretched his limbs. Sam was already passed out on the chair, mouth hanging open, and snoring loudly. Cas was staring at the TV screen with a look of pure confusion on his face.

“You all right there, Cas? You can’t scowl the screen to death you know.”

“I do not understand Dean. If the eagles are so powerful, why don’t they just fly them over Mount Doom and drop the ring in? It would be much more practical,” he replied looking over to Dean. He laughed and clapped a hand on Cas' shoulder as he stood up from the couch.

“That’d make for a boring movie don’t ya think?” he asked. Cas didn’t reply but he looked like he understood nonetheless. Dean chucked a throw pillow at Sam, who almost jumped up out of his seat.

“Get to bed Sammy, long day ahead of us,” he said turning off the television. Sam grumbled to himself as he trudged over to his bed. He plopped down and immediately fell back asleep.

Dean walked into the bathroom to brush his teeth and change into some nightclothes. When he came back out, he was surprised to see Cas lying on the couch staring at the ceiling. He shook his head in amusement.

“You know that thing pulls out into a bed right?” Dean offered.

“I do not sleep Dean,” Cas replied not taking his eyes off the ceiling.

“Yeah man, I know. But lying scrunched up on a two-seat couch can’t be comfortable. Pull that thing out.” Dean walked over to Cas, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him up. Cas didn’t offer any resistance and went with Dean’s movements. After the pullout couch was set up, Cas just stood next to it, frowning.

“What is it now Cas?” Dean asked exasperated.

“That doesn’t look much more comfortable.”

“Yeah, well, it’s probably not but at least you have more room. Now would ya lie down?” Dean pleaded, walking over to his own bed. Cas did as he was told. When he was finally comfortable, he turned his head to look at Dean.

“Goodnight Dean.”

“Night Cas.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aww, don't you just love Cas questioning the logic of movies? Cause I do! Anyway, thanks to everyone who gave the this kudos so far. The first chapter was kind of rough but it is going to pick up here soon! If I get my multitude of college papers finished in time and don't get too overwhelmed I hope the next chapter will be up sometime this weekend. You never know though, I could get bored and do it tomorrow. Also, please, please, please leave me some feedback, i'd really appreciate it :)


	3. Investigations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean, Sam, and Cas investigate the kidnappings in Oklahoma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to keep my promises and I promised to have the next chapter up this weekend! So Dean and Cas have another tiny heart to heart at the end of the chapter. Yay. Each chapter is getting longer and longer and I wanted to add more to this one but then it would've been way too long. Dean's emotions run a little high in this chapter and he is just generally angry. There is a reason behind it I swear. Cas' sadness doesn't stick around too much longer. Hopefully ;) Enjoy!

When the boys rolled into the police station the next morning, Dean was in a great mood. There was just something about new cases that made him feel relaxed. They were directed to the Sherriff’s office took a seat.

“Hello Sheriff Norling. I’m Detective Peters. These are my partners. Detectives Johnson and Judson,” Sam said, gesturing to Dean and Cas. They showed their badges and the Sheriff seemed to believe them. Sheriff Norling was a big guy with a big belly that could rival Santa Claus. He had a gray and black peppered goatee. His head was shaved bald and a pair of rectangle shaped glasses were perched on his nose.

“Alright well what can I help you with?”

“We want to know what’s going on with the missing girls,” said Cas. Dean glanced over at him. He made a mental note to teach him about empathy when they were back at the motel. Cas looked back at him with big puppy dog eyes that had Dean struggling to stay annoyed with him.

The sheriff sighed and looked sadly between the three men sitting in front of him. He reached into his desk drawer and pulled out two files. He threw them on the desk towards Sam and Dean.

“Jessie Sanders and Julie Frasier. Both 17, went missing about a week apart from each other. We are a small town so this thing doesn’t happen often you understand?”

Dean nodded his head. “Did the girls have anything in common? Where were they last seen?” he asked.

“They both were last seen near the edge of the woods out on Main. Other than that, the girls had nothing in common. They went to the same high school. But from what I understand they were from different crowds.”

“Alright thank you sheriff. Here is my card. Give me a call if you find anything else out,” Sam said handing him a business card. Dean grabbed the files and handed them off to Castiel. They left the Sheriff’s Department as quickly as they came.

“Okay,” Dean said once they were back in the Impala. “So we are looking for something that kidnaps teenage girls. Are we sure that this isn’t just some creepy old dude? I mean, this sort of thing isn’t uncommon in today’s world.”

“I know Dean, but maybe we should talk to the families first. It still could be something. Besides, they both disappeared from the same place. What do you think Cas? Do you think it’s worth sticking around?” Sam asked looking at the angel sitting in the backseat.

“I don’t know Sam. There is something strange about this town. I don’t like it,” he replied, a general look of concern spread across his face.

“See Dean, Even Cas thinks something weird is going here. I say we stay,” Sam said looking at his brother with a shit-eating grin on his face. Dean cast a look at Cas that could rival even Sam’s most powerful bitchface. Damn Sam, he knew that Dean couldn’t argue with Cas. But, he still didn’t think it was worth sticking around. He thought all they were going to find was two girls dead and no explanation for the families. There was nothing he hated more than not being able to stop the sadistic people in the world. With Cas on Sam’s side, he knew he wasn’t going to win this one. They’d be staying in Oklahoma for a few more days.

“Fine. Sam you take the Sanders’ and I’ll take the Frasier’s. Cas you wanna pop by that forest and see if your mojo can pick anything up?”

“Sure Dean.” Not two seconds later Cas was gone.

Dean looked at Sam and sighed. Friggin’ angels, he thought at Cas’ sudden disappearance.

The Sanders’ home was only a few blocks away from the station. Sam insisted that he was going to walk. Dean still didn’t understand his brother’s obsession with the whole “healthy living” thing. There was nothing that could beat a greasy burger and a beer. Grumbling about rabbit food, Dean clamored into the Impala. He drove off towards the vic’s house. If Dean could describe it in one word he'd say huge. And not like, bigger than anything he ever stayed in growing up, like huge huge. Mansion sized huge. The steps leading up to the front door were wide enough to fit at least five people across it . The second level had balcony the width of the house. There were a bunch of tiny shrubs and trees planted all over the front yard. This didn’t make Dean feel any better about the town. All he needed was a snot nosed, stuck up family complaining about everything. He knew he was being irrational and cranky. But his good mood from this morning had all but washed away, and he did not give two fucks. He stomped up the steps and rang the doorbell. It was at least five minutes until someone answered the door.

It swung open and a short, dark haired woman was standing in front of him. Her eyes were rimmed red as and she was sniffling. Great, she was crying.

“Can I help you?” she asked through sobs. Dean pulled out his badge and flashed it to her. Her eyes went wide and she gasped.

“I’m Detective Johnson. Mind if I ask you a few questions?”

“Um, yeah. Come in.” She stepped aside and let Dean enter. The inside of the house was just as extravagant as the outside. It was open and there was a grand staircase to left. The foyer was decorated in random lamps. A table in the middle of the room had some sort of plant sitting on it. They woman led him to the right and into a great room. Two couches sat opposite each other and a glass coffee table sat between them. Dean sat down and looked around, uncomfortable.

“Are you Julie’s mother?” he asked.

“Yes. I’m Candice. Have you found my daughter?” she asked hopeful. A pang of guilt washed through Dean.

“I’m sorry but no. My partners and I just got to town. I wanted to ask you some questions before we continued our investigation.”

“I’ve already answered all the polices questions. I just want you to find my daughter,” she pleaded.

“I know ma’am. The sooner you answer my questions, the sooner we can look for your daughter.” Dean was starting to get agitated. Every time they interviewed a loved one, they always fought back. Didn’t they realize that it would do them no good to argue?

“Fine. What do you want to know?”

“What was your daughter like in the weeks before she went missing? Was she acting any different than usual?”

“No. Not that I could tell. Julie wasn’t a popular girl at school. She liked to keep to herself.”

“Right. Did she make any new friends recently? Anything at all could help.” Candice thought for a few minutes. Dean was just about to give up when her eyes went wide in remembrance.

“She did make a new friend. About a week before she went missing. She’s only talked about her once or twice.” Now they were getting somewhere.

“Do you know her name or where they met?” “Her name was Blair. I think they met online. She lived here though; she was homeschooled. Julie was happy to meet someone who was shy like her.”

“Is there anyway that you could find out the website she was using and her username?”

“Yeah, but I am afraid I don’t know her password. Teenagers are all about their privacy.”

“That’s not a problem, I have someone who can get in there if need be. Why don’t you find that out? I need to make a call to my bro-partner,” Dean corrected himself. She nodded and headed up the staircase. As soon as she was out of sight, Dean pulled his phone out of his pocket. He scrolled through his contacts until he came to Sam’s name and pressed dial. He picked up after three rings.

“Hello? Dean? What’s up? I’m still talking to the other vic’s parents.”

“Yeah me too, but I figured you should know this. Turns out Julie made a new friend about a week before she disappeared. Find out if the other girl has made any new friends too. Maybe there is a connection there.”

“Alright Dean, that sounds good. Have you heard from Cas?”

“No, but he’s more than likely just waiting for us to get done questioning. I’ll call him when I am done and then we’ll meet you back at the motel okay?”

“Yeah sounds good. See ya later,” Sam said and he hung up. Dean had just put his phone back in his pocket when Candice walked back into the room. She was carrying a laptop in her hands.

“Apparently my daughter didn’t trust us not to go snooping in her things. Her laptop has a password as well.”

“That’s okay. Do you mind if I take it back with me? My friend can get in there.” She took a step back, obvious worry on her face. “Don’t worry. I will bring it back as soon as we are done. You won't even be able to tell anything happened to it.” She looked down at the laptop in her hands. She sighed and reluctantly handed it over to Dean.

“Thank you. I will drop it back off when we are done.”

Once back inside the Impala, Dean pulled his phone back out of his pocket. Not trusting the little hope he had that he’d actually answer, he clicked on Cas’ name. It went straight to voicemail.

“Dammit Cas,” Dean muttered angrily. “Cas if you can hear me, get your feathery ass here. We have to go meet Sam,” he prayed. Dean was ready for the sudden pop in. When that familiar rustle of wings came, he didn't jump ten feet in the air.

“Hello Dean.” He looked over at Cas in the passenger seat.

“Would it kill you to answer your phone?” he bit. “What’s the matter Dean? Have I done something to upset you?”

“Forget it.” Dean started the car and drove towards the motel.

Sam still wasn’t back by the time Dean and Cas arrived at the motel. They were sitting on the couch watching some random movie about ten minutes later. Dean looked over at Cas. His annoyance had faded completely. Now he was just feeling guilty about how he treated Cas. Judging by the look on his face, Cas wasn’t taking it well either.

“Cas, man, I’m sorry about earlier. I don’t know why I was acting like a grade-A douchebag.”

“It’s okay Dean. I was just worried that I upset you.”

“Not every time I am pissed off means I am pissed at you, Cas. Nine times out of ten even I don’t know what I am upset about. Why are you so worried that I am pissed at you anyway?”

Cas looked at Dean, sadness in his eyes. Dean clenched his teeth in anticipation. Something still wasn’t sitting right with him about this whole situation. Even though Cas had assured him he was fine, he couldn’t help thinking that he wasn't.

“Dean, I told you that I would find some way to redeem myself to you. I plan on keeping that promise.” Another wave of guilt washed over Dean. Is that what was still bothering him?

“I don’t want you thinking you owe me something Cas! I care about you man, we are practically family. You’ve more than made up for everything you've done. How many times can I tell you that?” There was a pause after Dean responded. He noticed that Cas was sitting straight as an arrow and his shoulder were tense. Dean was confused for about a second. At some point during the conversation, his hand had found its way onto Cas’ knee. He pulled it away before Cas could say anything. Trying to break the now awkward tension in the room, Dean spoke.

“I’m gonna go shower. If Sammy gets back before I’m done, tell him I’ll be right out. We have a lot to talk about.” Dean stood up from the couch, grabbed some clothes out of the bag that was sitting on his bed. He headed for a nice, long hot shower, shoving thoughts about Cas out of his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked it! Next chapter we get to hear about what happened at Sam's interview and what Cas found at the woods. Also, there will be a guest appearance from one of my favorite characters. Guess who! (It's really not that hard) The next chapter should be up within the next week but my cousins are coming into town from out of state and they always keep me busy. Until next time. :)


	4. Introducing Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean contemplates his relationship with Cas. Also, what happened with Sam and Cas during their investigation. And, a visit from Charlie Bradbury.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god. I am so sorry this took so long. In my defense, life has been pretty hectic lately. My aunt had to have surgery on Thanksgiving, leaving me to watch her kids. Also, finals week starts in a few days so I have been studying like crazy. Plus, a touch of drama with my roommates. ANYWAY. This chapter gave me a little bit of trouble at the beginning, another reason it took awhile. But I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. As I always ask, please leave some comments, i need some feedback! Enjoy!

Dean locked himself safely inside the bathroom. He turned on the water to an almost unbearable temperature. He stepped inside of the small shower and let the water hit him steadily on the back. He closed his eyes and stood there, unmoving. Despite the temperature, he felt a chill run through his body. What the hell was he doing putting his hand on Cas’ knee like that? He felt stupid. Dean had felt at ease whenever Cas was aroundEver since Cas had gotten back from Purgatory. It was like it was a puzzle piece that finally fit together. And hell if that wasn’t the most unmanly thing he’d ever thought in his life, but it was true. He missed having Cas around but why exactly? Cas had done more destruction in Heaven and on earth than Lucifer himself. Dean should gank him just on principal, but dick-God knows that he could never do it. They had been through way too much in the last five years together. Dean couldn't ever consider hurting him. He felt drawn towards Cas in a way that he had never experienced before. Not with Sam, Lisa, or even Cassie. This was something different.

Dean slammed his fist into the shower wall. What the fuck was going on with him? First he has some cliche chic-flic moments where he talks about feelings. Second he puts his hand on Cas’ knee. Now he was making some discovery that he felt something towards Cas? He needed to get out of this town. Fast.

He finished showering in record time and wrapped a towel around his waist. Dean didn't bother to changing right away. He brushed his teeth and stared into the mirror. He couldn’t find another excuse to stay in the bathroom any longer. He still needed to talk to Sam about what happened earlier. He pulled on sweatpants that sat low on his hips and an old AC/DC shirt. Tossing his towel on the floor, Dean opened the bathroom door.

Castiel was still sitting in the same spot on the couch where Dean had left him. He had a blank expression on his face. Sam was back and there were burgers sitting on the table. At first the glance of the food, Dean’s stomach grumbled. He tried to shove thoughts about Cas out of his mind again. Dean walked over to the table and grabbed a burger.

“So, Sammy,” Dean said through mouthfuls of burger, “what happened on your end?”

“Not much to be honest,” Sam said disappointed. “Although, you were right. Jessie did make a new friend, about a week before she went missing, although hers was a guy.”

“Julie’s new friend was a girl. Do you think there is any connection? Julie’s mom said she met her online. I have her laptop, I figured we could call Charlie and have her fly out here to help on this one.”

“It wouldn’t hurt. And Jessie’s new guy was a new kid at school. Could be that they were working together? Cas, what was the forest like?” asked Sam, looking at Cas. He was just sitting there, staring straight ahead, blank look still across his face. “Dean I think he is broken,” said Sam, trying to hide a smile. Dean just gave Sam his best bitchface and walked over to Cas. He grabbed him by the shoulder and shook him.

“Cas, hello? Trying to figure out a case here.” Cas blinked his eyes and looked up at Dean.

“My apologies. I seemed to have ‘zoned out’,” he replied, finger quotes and all. “It’s alright man, just tell us what happened at the forest.”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed. “I’m not quite sure. The forest was not a forest, only a basic tree line that hid a horse farm. But there was something strange about the place.”

“Did you do any investigating?” Dean asked.

“No, it was strange, I didn’t like the feeling there. I left.”

“Then what took you so long answering me?” Cas glanced over a Sam, then back at Dean and gulped.

“Fine, don’t tell me,” Dean said, “Sam, call Charlie, I’m going for a drive.” Dean grabbed his keys off the nightstand and stormed out of the motel room.

Dean drove around in the Impala for what seemed like forever. But glancing at the clock, he realized it had only been an hour. He half expected Cas to pop in and apologize again. Even thought he didn't need to. Sure Dean was a dick 95% of the time, but his behavior lately was deplorable. Cas didn’t deserve any of what Dean was doing since they had shown up in this lame-ass town. He didn’t know why he kept doing it. Dean felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He hit the button that lit up the screen and saw a text from Sam.

_I don’t know what’s wrong with you but Charlie just happened to be a few towns over. Go pick her up and you better have sorted out your issues before you come back._

Great. Now Dean knew he was a royal fuck-up. He slammed his hand on the steering wheel. Every time something good happens in his life, he always fucks it up. Wallowing in his self-pity, Dean drove to the town Sam had told him Charlie was staying in. It took another half hour to get there. When he saw Charlie’s red hair, his mood lightened. Besides Sam and Cas, she was the only friend he had. Of course he would be happy to see her. He stopped the Impala in front of her and rolled down the window.

“Good evening my Queen,” he said, flashing his best smile.

“Handmaiden,” she replied hopping into the passenger seat.

“How are ya Charlie?” he asked.

“Oh ya know, hacking into computers, the simple life.” Dean chuckled and drove away. Dean figured he should tell Sam he picked up Charlie. He pulled out his phone and typed out a message.

“Ya know, you shouldn’t text and drive,” muttered Charlie.

“Oh come on. You sound like Sam.”

His phone buzzed not a minute later. The reply had Dean gripping the steering wheel so hard his knuckles turned white. Charlie, not missing a beat, cast Dean a concerned look.

“Easy there Dean, what’d that thing ever do to you?”

Anger was bursting through his veins. He clenched his teeth so he wouldn’t go off on yet another person he cared about.

“Seriously Dean, what’s up?”

“Dumbass Sam…dumbass Cas,” he muttered. Charlie grabbed Dean’s phone out of his hand before he had the chance to even try to stop her. Damn women and their quick hands. Charlie read the message and tilted her head to look at Dean.

“Don’t give me that look Charlie.”

“What look? You aren’t even looking at me!” she said defensive.

“It’s the same puppy-dog look Sam gives me. He uses it whenever he wants to talk about feelings. I can just tell.”

“But this time its not Sam wanting to talk…it’s me!”

“Your point?” he asked glancing at her.

“Come on Dean. I read the Carver Edlund books. I know the self-hatred that’s running through your head right now. If you don’t talk about it its just going to get worse,” she said.

“Those fucking books. Is there nothing he didn’t write in them?”

“No.”

“God dammit,” he groaned.

“Dean, you can’t ignore this.” Fed up, Dean pulled the Impala to the side of the road. He threw the car in park and turned his whole body to face Charlie.

“Fine. You want me to talk about my feelings and all that other girly crap? I’m dealing with a suicidal angel who thinks he owes me some big ass forgiveness. He always thinks I’m pissed at him no matter what I say. Oh and there is also the fact that I am in love with the bastard. I stormed out of our motel room because he wouldn’t tell me why he wouldn’t answer me. So now he probably thinks I hate even more than he already does. And don’t even get me started on my self-righteous brother.” As soon as Dean finished talking, he wished he wouldn’t have said anything. That he just kept driving and pushed everything down. He had to admit though, it felt good to get it off his chest. It also didn’t help that Charlie was just sitting there, smiling.

“Okay Charlie, cut it out. The smiling thing is creepy.” That seemed to shake her out of her trance.

“For reals? You’re in love with Cas? Finally!” Charlie squealed, clapping her hands together.

“That’s what you got out of that? And what do you mean, finally?”

“The books Dean! The books! Anyone with eyes can see how much you two are in love. I was surprised it took you this long to figure it out!”

“I didn’t even know until today Charlie! How could you work that out?”

“Oh Dean, it’s not your fault you’re emotionally constipated.” Dean just rolled his eyes at her.

"Charlie, I don’t know what to do here. How do you deal with a suicidal angel who thinks you hate him?”

“Dean, have you even thought about telling him you love him?” He stared at her for a few minutes. He couldn’t tell Cas he loves him. He couldn’t. Every single person he cares about winds up dead. He won’t risk losing Cas the same way. He tells Charlie just as much.

“I know you think you aren’t worth it Dean, but you are. Think about all those people you saved. You stopped the friggin apocalypse. Besides, Cas may be a different species, but you come from the same world. There is no running away from this for him. He has just as much a chance of dying with or without you.”

Dean tried to find an argument…but he couldn’t. Maybe she was right. Maybe she wasn’t. This wasn’t just something he could blurt out over Sunday dinner. He needed time to think. Good thing he had another fifteen minute drive and maybe a quick stop at the store left. So, he turned on his old Kansas cassette tape, and drove off towards the motel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Dean tell Cas or won't he? Find out next chapter! Tbh i almost wrote a lil smut scene when Dean was in the shower but I didn't think it fit, so i didn't. I hope you like this chapter! Charlie is one of my favorite characters! Next chapter might not be up for a little bit because of finals and papers and such, but as soon as i know, you'll know!


	5. Here Comes the Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean's a dick, Charlie straightens him out, kind of, and Sam remains oblivious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! It's been a couple weeks I know, but this chapter was killing me. But, I finally finished! Yay! First MERRY CHRISTMAS, or happy holidays if you don't celebrate Christmas! Second, I would like to preface this chapter just by saying that I have this headcanon that Dean does silly things to cheer up Cas and I know this isn't an AU story but for the sake of destiel i personally think he would do something like this so fair warning. I also love to think of Charlie as Dean's confidant. So whatever. Enjoy!

“We gotta stop and pick up some stuff. Don’t mind do you?” Dean asked Charlie as he pulled into the parking lot of a rundown Wal-Mart.

“Don’t have a choice now do I?” she replied grinning.

“Good point. You coming in or what?” Dean asked climbing out of the Impala. He started walking toward the entrance, Charlie hot on his heels.

“What do you have to get?” she asked once she caught up to him.

“Food. As much as I love them, I can’t eat burgers every night and it looks like we'll be here for a few more days. I’ll even let you pick out what we eat, minding the fact that I don’t do rabbit food. Go grab some grub and beer. I have one other thing I gotta do,” Dean responded stopping in the middle of an aisle way.

“Wow Dean. You’re actually letting me pick food? Do I need to drive you to the doctor’s? You sure you’re feeling okay?” Charlie laughed, placing a hand on Dean’s forehead.

“Funny. Just go get something before I change my mind.” Dean smiled and pushed her in the direction of the food. Once Charlie was out of sight, Dean pulled his phone out of his pocket. He opened the message Sam had sent him.

_Cas is gone. Got in the shower and when I came out he was nowhere in sight. Good job. I don’t know what going on with you two but you better fix it before he does something stupid._

Where did Sam get off telling Dean to fix shit? Granted, he was right, but Dean wasn’t going to admit that. He typed back a message to Sam.

 _dont worry about it sammy. i am sure he is ok._ But Dean didn’t know for sure if Cas was fine or not. If he took past interactions with the angel into account, he’d go with no. The thought of that worried him. When he finally got to the aisle he’d been looking for he scanned through the shelves. He couldn’t believe he was actually going to do this. The idea popped into his head in the parking lot. Normally, Dean wouldn’t be caught dead in this part of the store. Let alone buying something from it. But he didn’t know how else to make the situation better.

When he found what it was that he was looking for, he grabbed it off the shelf and went to find Charlie. He found her standing in the cookie aisle, of all places. She was carrying a small basket in one hand and a box of Double Stuffed Oreo’s in the other.

“When I said go get food, I meant food-food. Not junk Charlie,” Dean said, trying to hide the grin on his face. Her head snapped up when she heard his voice and she almost dropped the cookies.

“Jesus Dean. You scared the crap out of me. And I did get food-food!” she said showing him the basket.

“Pasta and popcorn shrimp? That’s got to be the weirdest combination of food I’ve ever heard.”

“Yes. And hello? You act like you’ve never had seafood alfredo before.” She looked down to the item Dean had in his hands.

“What’s that?” Dean’s stomach dropped. He put his hands behind his back and started to back away from Charlie.

“Uh…it’s nothing.” Charlie put the Oreo’s back on the shelf and lunged at Dean.

“That isn’t ‘nothing’. Come on. Show me.”

“Nope,” Dean replied dodging her. But Charlie was too quick for him. She reached behind his back and grabbed the object from his hands. She looked down at it and back up at Dean, who was standing there with a wistful look on his face. She ignored it and smiled.

“Is this what I think it is?”

“Look,” Dean said, snatching the item back from Charlie. “I’m not making some huge gesture and getting all lovey-dovey on him. Or telling him anything at all actually. He’s just upset and I didn’t know how else to get him to lighten up. Me talking to him isn’t working.”

“He’s going to love it Dean. But you should tell him how you feel.”

“Yeah. Right,” Dean paused, “And Harry Potter should've joined the Death Eaters. I’m not even sure I am in love with him, Charlie. Besides, I’m not gay and I just…it’s complicated. I’m pretty sure it’s just whatever creature it is in this town fucking with me.”

“Ah. There it is,” Charlie scowled at Dean. “What? There what is?”

“Look Dean, I’m going to be straight with you. Hah straight,” Charlie laughed at herself. “I am going to tell you how it is because no one has ever done that with you before. I know you have this big, gay panic thing going on right now. So I’m not going force this on you. You’ll come to terms with it when you’re ready, but you do love him Dean. I know you do. The sooner you realize that, the better off the both of you will be. Plus, there is such a thing as being bi.”

“Whatever. Let’s just go,” he replied, stomping towards the cashier. Charlie sighed and followed after him.

The first thing Dean noticed when walking into the motel room was that Cas was still gone. He had to admit that it hurt him when he realized that. The second thing he noticed was Sam glaring at him from across the room.

“Got a problem Sammy?” Dean half yelled. Sam’s gaze left Dean’s and started to talk to Charlie.

“It’s great to see you Charlie. But we’ll have to get another room, we all can't fit in here.”

“Sure thang,” she said smiling, “Dean can have his own room. I’ll share with you.” Charlie smiled at Dean. He who was now sitting on the couch flipping though television channels.

“Why does Dean get his own room?” Sam pouted, completely oblivious.

“Oh…uh…reasons,” Charlie replied shortly. Dean knew what exactly the reason was that she was talking about. She hoped he would get the sense to call up Cas and profess his “undying love” to him. Yeah, right. Charlie may be a romantic at heart and have read every Carver Edlund book. But she didn’t know the first thing about the relationship he and Cas now shared. It just wasn’t that simple. Up until now, he had only ever seen Cas as a friend, if that. He never gave him any reason to think otherwise.

“Alright then. What’s in that bag Dean?” asked Sam. He pointed to the extra plastic bag sitting on Dean’s, well Charlie’s now, bed.

“None of your damn business,” he growled. Sam threw his hands up in surrender.

“I’ll go get that other room, you two stay here. I’ll be back before you can say Quidditch,” Charlie said. She grabbed her purse off the table and walked out the door.

Sam, being Sam, decided to take the opportunity of Charlie’s absence to question Dean.

“So uh, Dean?”

“What Sammy?” he huffed in response.

“Uh, what is going on with you lately? I’ve never seen you get so worked up over nothing. Storming off is one thing, but you never yell at Cas.” Dean sighed and turned off the TV.

“Look, everything’s fine, Sammy. I’ve had enough chic-flic moments to last me a lifetime in the past few days. I don’t want anymore so let’s just drop it.”

“At least apologize Dean. He deserves that much.” But Dean just glared at Sam, who took that as his clue that he’d pushed too far and went to go make dinner. Charlie came back just as Sam was finishing cooking. She tossed the new motel key at Dean, who caught it effortlessly. Once they all had gotten their food, Dean grabbed the vic's laptop from his bag. He handed it to Charlie.

“We were hoping you could get into this and find out who this new ‘friend’ Julie was talking to is.” Charlie glanced down at the laptop and back up to Dean, a smile spreading across her lips.

“Easy-peasy. Shouldn’t take too long. I’ll have it done by morning.”

“Oh,” said Dean turning back, “and don’t jack anything up on there. I told the girl’s mom nothing would happen to it.”

“Dean Winchester, I am offended,” gasped Charlie, a pretend hurt look on her face. Ignoring her, Dean went back to eating.

When everyone was done Dean cleaned up the kitchen. He grabbed his bags, deciding to hit the hay early, and headed off to his room. The first thing he did when he got in there was collapse on the bed. It had been a long day and Dean wanted some sleep. But, just as he was about to drift off, he thought of the gift he bought Cas. He begrudgingly sat up on the bed. He sighed and pulled out his cell phone from his pocket. He scrolled down until he found Cas’ contact and let his thumb hover over the call button. He contemplated calling, but after a minute Dean put his phone on the side table. It’s not like he was going to pick up anyway right?

“Alright Cas. I know you can hear me. Come here. We need to talk,” Dean said to the empty room. He waited, but there was nothing. “Dammit Cas. Come on. Don’t make me say please,” he tried again but there was still no answer. “Please?” Dean asked, finally, after another few minutes. That did the trick and the room was now filled with two men instead of one.

“What is it Dean?”

“Look man, I’m sorry about earlier.”

“You don’t have to apologize Dean,” Castiel said sitting down.

“Actually I do. And I am going to keep doing it. Until you get it through your head that you shouldn't feel like you’ve let me down.” Castiel made no response, which made Dean a tiny bit frustrated. But what wasn’t making him frustrated nowadays? Dean pulled himself up from the bed and crossed to where his duffle was sitting on the floor.

“When I went to pick up Charlie today, we stopped at the store. I may have gotten you something,” he said picked up the bag and unzipping it. Cas didn’t say anything but Dean could tell he was curious. With a smirk forming on Dean’s face he pulled out the item from his bag. He hid it behind his back so Cas couldn’t see it just yet.

“What is it Dean?” he asked; now almost bouncing out of his seat with excitement. Dean only laughed and continued walking towards him. He stopped when he stood only a few feet in from him.

“Hold out your hands,” Dean instructed and Cas did. Dean took his hands from behind his back and placed the object in Cas’ hands.

“Now I know it’s a little cheesy, and I don’t know exactly why I thought it was a good idea. Hell, I don’t even know what you’re going to do with it, you don’t even sleep but, well, there ya go.” Cas didn’t say anything for a while; he just kept staring down at the thing in his hands. It was a bumblebee PillowPet. Not one of the full-sized ones, but the mini kind so it was just a stuffed animal.

“Look Cas, if you don’t like it I can just take it back,” Dean said, reaching for the object. Cas jerked it away from him and snapped his head up to look Dean right in the eyes. His face was soft and there was a hint of a smile forming on Cas’ lips.

“I love it, Dean.”

“Oh. Well, good. I know back when you weren’t, ya know, yourself, you used to talk about bees all the time. I figured you still liked them or whatever,” Dean said scratching the back of his neck.

“It is perfect, Dean. Thank you,” Cas said, this time with a full smile across his face that reached all the way up to his eyes. Dean couldn’t help but think that it was nice to finally see a smile on his face after so long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, how sweet is that? I thought I should end this chapter on an uplifting note because the next few aren't going to be so uplifting. Next chapter we will finally, hopefully, find out what creature/being/thing TFW has to deal with, which means finding out what's got Dean all messed up. I hope hope hope that I will have the next chapter done by next weekend...fingers crossed. As always, leave me some feedback :)


	6. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TFW and Charlie team up to figure what's stirring up Cedar Creast, Oklahoma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoop! New chapter! To be honest, I had been putting off writing this because I wasn't sure what exactly was going to come of it. I hate filler chapters. BUT, once I actually sat down and started writing it just kept coming and coming and this is my longest chapter yet! The first part of the chapter is in Charlie's perspective but that doesn't last too long and it goes right back to Dean's. We finally find out what the creature is and Dean is making small steps to revealing his feelings to Cas! Enjoy!

Charlie had just gotten into the girl’s laptop when she found something rather interesting. It took her a few minutes to collect her composure before she was able to show it to Sam. They weren’t going to like this and she thought it was hilarious.

“Hey. Sam. Come look at this,” she called to him from the kitchenette. He got up from his perch on the couch to come stand behind her. “Looks like Miss Julie was a fan of the Supernatural books.”

“Oh god. Why? If Chuck wasn’t already dead, I’d kill him,” he groaned.

“It looks like her new friend was also a big fan of the books…that’s all they talked about.” She scrolled through messages and emails only reading parts of them. She was just trying to get the gist of their conversations.

“Please Charlie. Don’t tell me they like the whole Dean slash Sam thing,” Sam groaned.

“Don’t worry Sam, people have moved on from that,” she replied.

“What are you talking about?”

“Uh…nothing.”

“Charlie,” Sam said, sitting in the chair next to her, with his best bitchface.

“Don’t worry about it Sam,” Charlie said focusing back on the laptop. “Oh, look! Julie and Blair were going to be meeting up the night Julie disappeared.”

“Huh. That’s odd. Think she’s got anything to do with it?”

“Maybe. We’ll show this to Dean tomorrow. And maybe I’ll finally get to meet the famous Castiel.”

“I wouldn’t get your hopes up, Charlie. He’s been kind of…off lately.”

“Oh I think he’ll be fine,” Charlie muttered to herself.

“What was that Charlie?”

“Oh, uh. I said he’d be fine.” Charlie was screwed now. Even though she was dying to talk about it, she didn’t want to out Dean to his brother.

“How would you know that?” he asked. Charlie lifted her gaze to meet Sam’s.

“I just, uh, do.”

“Is Dean going to finally tell Cas how he feels about him?” Sam asked bluntly. And…that was not what Charlie was expecting to come out of Sam’s mouth.

“What?” Charlie gaped. Sam laughed quietly.

“Come on Charlie. I’m not blind. I have lived with the both of them since they popped back from Purgatory.”

“I guess you’ve got a good point. Maybe I have underestimated your intuition.”

“I was going to be a lawyer, Charlie. Give me a little credit,” Sam said, a smile forming on his lips. “But seriously. Is he going to?” Charlie looked at Sam and took a deep breath.

“I doubt it Sam. It was luck that got him to admit it to me. If he does, I’ll be shocked. He’s got that inner turmoil thing going on," she said gesturing to her chest area.

“Couldn’t you, ya know, talk him into it? They are killing me,” Sam pleaded.

“Believe me, I tried. It’s just something he’s gotta work out on his own.” Sam nodded his head in understanding. Charlie closed the laptop and stood up.

“Well, I’m gonna hit the hay. Night Sam!” With that, Charlie grabbed her bag off the bed and trotted into the bathroom. Sam laughed to himself and went over to his own bed and crashed.

Back in Dean’s room, he and Cas were sitting on the couch watching some rerun of an old TV show. Dean kept sneaking glances at Castiel every so often. Once or twice he could’ve sworn he caught Cas looking at him too. Somewhere deep in the back of Dean’s mind, he knew Charlie was right. He should tell Cas how he feels, if he feels anything at all. He just couldn’t bring himself to speak up. Dean still couldn’t wrap his head around this whole thing. Part of him wanted to shove this whole thing down and forget about it. The other part wanted to speak the truth. Both to himself and Cas. Dean was working out which part would win when Cas broke the silence.

“Are you okay Dean? You seem upset.” Dean looked to Cas and met his bright blue eyes.

“Yeah, man. I’m fine. I think something is messing with me is all.” This wasn’t a lie. Dean did feel out of sorts ever since they came into town.

“Do you think its whatever is here?”

“Maybe. I’m leaning towards yes. So let’s figure out what it is and kill it. I want to go back to normal and stop acting like a fifteen year old girl.” Cas’ eyes softened at Dean’s statement.

“You haven’t been that bad, Dean.” Dean laughed.

“Yeah. Okay, Cas. I only yelled at you and stormed off because you wouldn’t tell me where you were." After a pause he said, "I am sorry about that, you know.” Cas reached up and put a hand on Dean’s shoulder.

“I know, Dean. I forgive you.” Dean looked down at the hand on his shoulder and felt his throat go dry. He stood up and swallowed.

“Right. Well. I’m going to go to bed now. See ya tomorrow, Cas,” he said bolting for the bathroom. Dean moved so fast, he didn’t see the way Cas’ face fell when he threw off his hand from his shoulder.

 

Early the next morning, Dean stomped over to Charlie and Sam’s room, half asleep and cranky. Charlie, it seemed, was an early riser like Sam. The two of them were sitting around the table, laptops open, and drinking coffee. When Dean walked in they both just smiled at him and continued talking. Not even saying hello, Dean sauntered into the kitchen and poured himself some coffee. Then he sat down next to Charlie at the table.

“So,” he grumbled, “find anything interesting?”

“Julie was a fan of the Supernatural books,” Sam answered. “Apparently that’s all her and Blair talked about. They came up with theories and stuffabout the characters and such.”

“Great,” Dean groaned. “Just what I need, girls who are obsessed with me and my brother…together.” He shuddered at the thought.

“Actually, Dean, they were more into you and Cas,” Sam said, smirking. Dean almost spit out his coffee.

“What? That’s…that’s completely ridiculous. Why is that even a thing?” he stammered. This was even better. In the midst of his real crisis with Cas, there were teenagers who wanted them to hook up. If only…he shook the thought out of his head.

“Come off it Dean. I know,” Sam said. Dean downright glared at Charlie.

“Hey, don’t look at me,” she said holding her hands up, “He figured it out all on his own.”

“Great. That’s just great. I don’t need this right now,” Dean said, putting his head on the table.

“Hey I’m not gonna say anything, Dean. But, uh, just so you know. I support you.”

“Can we just not talk about this right now, okay?” Dean said picking his head back up off the table. “Let’s talk case. You find out anything else?” Charlie looked at Sam for the go ahead. He nodded at her.

“Blair and Julie were supposed to meet up the night she went missing. Chances are it’s the same situation with Jessie and her new ‘friend’,” Charlie said.

“Great. So we need to find this friend of Jessie’s then. Do you his name?”

“Yeah. Justin,” Sam said. “Awesome. I also want to check out the horse farm Cas found. Seeing as he didn’t actually do any investigating. Looks we gotta split up,” he paused, “Whaddya think Charlie? Think you can interrogate a teenage boy? Sam, Cas and I will investigate that farm?”

“Hells yeah!” she said. You could see the excitement forming in her eyes. “But why do I have to go alone?”

“Yeah Dean? I could go with her. It’s not a big deal.”

“Nah she can handle it, Sammy. Besides, whatever is going on there freaked Cas out the last time he was there. That ain’t no small feat.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“By the way, Dean. When do I get to meet Castiel?” Charlie smiled. He didn’t even have to respond. Right after she finished asking the question there was a ruffle of wings. Castiel sitting in the last empty chair at the table.

“Holy spit that was so cool!” Charlie half-yelled.

“Hello, Charlie,” Cas said, “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Wow. I get it now. He is dreamy!” she laughed. Cas cocked his head to the side in that way that was pure Cas and it made Dean’s heart flip in his chest. From fondness or pure fear at Charlie’s words, he wasn’t quite sure.

“What do you mean?” he asked, innocently.

“Nothing! She means nothing, Cas!” Dean exclaimed, clapping a hand on Cas’ shoulder. He shot a death glare at Charlie, who mouthed an apology. “Glad you’re here man. We were just getting ready to do some investigating. You’re with me and Sam today.”

“Okay, Dean,” Cas said with a small smile like he was genuinely happy about it.

They all piled into the Impala and drove Charlie to the high school. Dean told her they’d call when they were done. He told her not to get into any arguments over which Lord of the Rings character was better. Charlie laughed, flipped him the bird, and walked into the school. The boys then drove off to the horse farm. They parked on the side of the road and climbed out of the car.

“You were here before, Cas, so you lead the way,” Dean said. He gestured in front of him to make his point. Cas started walking towards a small set of bushes. They had some weird flower buds and had been placed in front of what looked like a small path.

“This leads all the way back to the horse farm,” Cas said his voice shaking. Dean noticed right away something was wrong with him. He grabbed Cas by the shoulders and turned him around to face him.

“Are you okay? Cas?” he asked. Cas had his eyes shut tight and was holding his breath. “Cas? Come on. Look at me.” He let out his breath and opened his eyes. The fear and sorrow Dean saw in them made him want to pull Cas into a giant bear hug. He wanted to tell him everything was going to be okay. Instead, he turned to Sam, who was looking at the bushes, to say that maybe they should leave. At least, that’s what he was going to say, but Sam had already started talking.

“Dean, I know these flowers. We need to get back to the motel, I want to double check to be sure.” He walked up to Dean and Cas, bundle of flowers in his hands. “You alright Cas?” He nodded his head. Dean tossed Sam the car keys.

“You drive. I’m gonna sit in the back with him. I’ll send Charlie a text that we’re coming to get her.”

 

Sam pulled up to the high school, in what seemed like no time. Charlie was sitting on the curb waiting for them. When she saw Sam driving, she stopped in her tracks. When she saw Dean in the backseat with Cas, her mouth dropped. She climbed into the Impala. The look on Sam’s face told her not to say anything so she told them what happened with Justin. “So, Justin wasn’t at school today or any day since Jessie went missing. They tried to contact his parents. It seems that they aren’t answering their phones.” “I figured as much,” Sam said, “ We’ll fill you in on our way back to the motel.”

 

Once inside the motel room, Sam went straight to researching pulling out books. Charlie helped, looking up things on the Internet. Dean pulled Cas over to the couch, where he sat him down right next to him. He never moved his arm from around his back.

“What happened out there, Cas?” he asked softly. Cas looked at Dean, still upset.

“I…I don’t know. Emotion just…overwhelmed me. It was unpleasant,” he said taking a deep breath. It hitched, like after a little kid was crying and couldn’t catch their breath. Dean didn’t know what to say so he did the only thing he could think of. He pulled Cas into a hug. It seemed to surprise him at first, judging by the way his body tensed at the sudden movement. But, after a few seconds, he relaxed into it, letting out another deep breath. He wrapped his arms around Dean’s middle, returning it.

Sam jumped up from the table with a sudden shout. “Found it!” he exclaimed, half running over to where Dean and Cas were sitting. “Uh, Dean?” he asked, awkward, seeing the moment he and Cas were having. Cas pulled away from Dean and looked up at Sam and Charlie, who was now standing next to him.

“What’d you find, Sammy?” Dean asked, too embarrassed to meet his brother’s eye.

“The flowers on the bushes at the entrance? They are Myrtus flowers,” he said.

“Okay and?” Dean asked, not following.

“Well, the flowers mixed with the horses and the few doves I saw….” Cas cut him off.

“Aphrodite.” Was all he said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun dunnn. Did anyone think that's who it was? I went back and forth for awhile deciding what creature/thing to use and Aphrodite won. Next chapter will be the big "fight", if you could even call it that, and some sadness for Dean and Cas. Like there hasn't been enough of that right? I hope to have the next chapter next weekend, but I go back to school Sunday and start the new semester Monday! We shall see! As always, leave some feedback :)


	7. Bye-Bye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TFW, plus Charlie, bring the smack down. Dean is an idiot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay new chapter! We are almost done! One more chapter after this and an epilogue! I sorta changed up the way I wrote this chapter but not too much. Dean is irrational when he's angry. I'd just like to point that out before you read. Also! I am sorry if anything is off with Aphrodite. I kinda changed lore to fit the fic's purposes. I don't really know that much about her. Anyway....Enjoy!

“Aphrodite? You’re kidding me?” Dean asked, looking up at Sam.

“It’s the only thing that makes sense, Dean,” Sam replied.

“How? How does that make sense?” Dean felt like he’d stepped into some weird teen sci-fi book. Sure they’d faced some pagan gods and shit before, but Aphrodite? That’s a big shot name. All the god and goddesses they’ve faced before were only minor ones.

“I already told you, Dean, The flowers, the horses, the doves; they are all sacred to her. It couldn’t be anything else.” Dean massaged his hand over his face and then looked back to Castiel.

“So, what do we do? Can we kill her?” Dean asked.

“I think so. Looks like a blessed stake to the heart will do the trick,” said Sam, reading off his laptop.

“We’ll go tomorrow. Cas needs some rest and I don’t want to do this without him,” Dean said standing up. He reached out and grabbed Cas’ hand and pulled him up too.

“I’m fine Dean,” Cas protested. But, Dean just ignored him and started walking toward the door.

“See ya tomorrow bright and early,” he said and walked out the door.

Charlie, Sam, and Cas stood there for a few more minutes, exchanging confused looks. No one knew what to say. Sam observed Cas and it looked like he was back to normal. It was almost like nothing happened at all. He shrugged and went off to start his nightly routine. Charlie went back to her laptop and Castiel popped out of sight.

 

XoXoX

 

Dean was lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He was finally starting to calm down and feel content that tomorrow all this would be over. They could finally leave this town and go somewhere else. Maybe they could take a break from hunting for a while. Dean wasn’t getting any younger and he knew how much Sam would love the idea of a break. Truth be told, Dean was starting to get tired of hunting. He’d deny it if anyone ever asked, but sometimes he craved a normal life just as much as Sammy did.

He wasn’t going to kid himself though. He knew there was never getting out of the hunting life. But it was nice to think that maybe he, Sammy, maybe even Cas too, could settle down. Somewhere where everyone he loved could be happy. Yeah, he liked that.

Dean was finally falling asleep when there was a knock on his door. Then there was the familiar ruffle of wings. He sat up on the bed and saw Cas standing at the foot of it.

“Hello, Dean. I knocked first. No sudden ‘popping in’,” he said, finger quotes and all.

“It’s okay, man. How’re ya feeling?” Dean patted the spot next to him, invited Cas to sit down, which he did.

“Better now that I understand why that place affected me so much,” he said.

“How do you mean?”

“Aphrodite is the goddess of love. She can influence emotion.”

“So she’s the reason I’ve been acting like a whiny bitch lately?”

“I’d assume so yes. It also explains me. Angels, as you know, aren’t emotional beings. Her presence was heightening all my emotions.”

“So it wasn’t anything I did to upset you?” Dean asked, hopeful.

“No, Dean,” Cas said sincerely.

“Thank fuck,” Dean sighed, lying back against the pillows.

“I wanted to thank you for helping me, Dean,” Cas said. Dean turned his head to look at Cas.

“Don’t sweat it man. You’d have done the same for me or Sammy,” he replied and then let out a huge yawn.

“Go to sleep, Dean. As you said, we have an early day tomorrow. I will go lie on the couch.” But before he could get up Dean stopped him.

“Nah man, that one doesn’t pull out, just lay here,” he said moving under the covers.

“Are you sure Dean?” asked Cas, hesitantly.

“Would ya just lie down already?” Dean growled. And so Cas, too, crawled under the covers. If Dean let his hand barely touch Cas’, well, no one but Cas was there to see it.

 

XoXoX

 

The next morning went by in a rush. They were up way too early, in Dean’s opinion, and pulled up to the horse farm around 7:30. Dean parked the Impala in the same spot he had the day before and turned to Cas in the backseat.

“If this makes you uncomfortable you can stay back, Cas”

“I will be fine,” he said but Dean wasn’t so sure. Regardless of his feelings towards Cas, the four of them climbed out of the car. They started walking towards the barn not wanting to be seen.

The whole walk, Dean would look back to make sure Cas was okay. He wasn’t shaking or near tears in anyway so he took that as a good sign. Before they walked into the barn, Sam handed everyone a blessed stake. Sam went in first, followed by Dean, then Castiel, and then Charlie.

Upon first look, the barn looked like any ordinary barn. Dean couldn’t help but think he’d recognized it somehow. When he saw the look on Cas’ face, though, the realization hit him like a ton of bricks.

“That bitch,” Dean cursed under his breath. “Come out you fucking bitch!” he yelled.

“Dean? What are you doing?” Sam whispered. Dean uncurled himself from his hunter’s crouch and held his arms out to his sides.

“We’re here Aphro-bitch. Let’s have a chat.” He turned around in circle looking around the room for her. Out of the corner of the room there was a clapping. Aphrodite stood up and walked over to where the four were standing. Her blonde hair fell down to her hips. She wore a crown made up of the same flower Sam found on the bushes and a long white dress.

“Finally figure it out, Dean?” she asked, a sly smile on her lips.

“Why us, you bitch? Why couldn’t you just stick to fixing up couple who had a chance together?” Dean bit through clenched teeth. Charlie gasped at his words.

“Dean is this the-?” Charlie started.

“Yes. This is the barn where I first met Cas.”

“I don’t understand, Dean,” Cas said, coming up behind him.

“She’s been fucking with us, Cas. Making us, me, feel things that aren’t real. She used the girls as bait to get us here.”

“Good, Dean. But, you aren’t quite right. Yes, I did use the girls as bait, who I might add, are safe at home now. And yes I’ve been making you feel things, but all those things are real. I only…extenuated them a bit.”

“You are a liar!” Dean yelled.

“I don’t think she is lying," Sam said, "Think about it Dean, why were you so angry all the time? Why did you want to do these nice things for Cas? You’ve done things this week that I know for a fact that you wouldn’t have done. Not without a little motivation,” he reasoned.

“You stay the fuck out of it Sam,” Dean said.

“He’s right, Dean,” Aphrodite laughed. “It’s so sad. You can’t see what’s right in front of you.”

“Shut. The. Fuck. Up.” Dean couldn’t control his anger anymore; he needed to get everything off his chest.

“You are wrong. Cas has been a pain in my ass ever since he popped back from Purgatory. I tried to help him but nothing I do works. He doesn’t love me and I don’t love him. So I don’t know why you all think we do. I don’t deserve it anyway. So, bitch, you can kiss my lily white ass.” With that, Dean lunged at Aphrodite and plunged his steak right into her chest. She let out a wail and Dean staggered back. Blue ooze erupted from the wound and was spilling onto the ground in front of her. With a final gasp, Aphrodite crumpled to the ground. Dean and the others watched her fall and then turned to look at each other. As soon as Dean met Cas’ eyes he regretted everything he said. He didn’t mean any of it. But before he could say anything, Cas disappeared.

“Son of a bitch,” Dean groaned. Sam walked up and put a hand on his shoulder.

“Come on Dean, let’s get back to the motel.”

 

XoXoX

 

Cas didn’t show up the rest of the night. The three of them drove to the victim’s houses to make sure what Aphrodite said was true. She wasn’t lying. Both girls were at home and didn’t remember anything about what happened to them. They drove to the diner and ate, not much conversation being made. As soon as they got back to the motel, Dean went straight to his room to shower. The first thing he saw was the pillow pet he’d gotten Cas sitting on the edge of the bed. There was a note on top of it. He walked over and picked it up.

_Dear Dean,_

_By the time you read this I will have already left. Normally I wouldn’t bother with such formalities, but I didn’t want to worry you. I am fine…or I will be. I realize that I have been frustrating and burden lately. I will no longer be hunting with you and Sam. I will keep to myself from now on.Goodbye, Dean._

_Cas._

Dean crumpled up the note and threw it across the room.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep in mind that Aphrodite was only playing on Dean and Cas' emotions. Not Sam or Charlie's. This is why they act normally and it's hard to pick up that something is causing Dean's mood swings. He thinks it just him being a baby. There are few things I need to wrap up in that sense next chapter. Which hopefully should be up...maybe this weekend? Classes have started up again so we will see how busy I get! As always, feedback is greatly appreciated :)


	8. Forgivness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam is fed up with Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I lied. There is one more chapter after this and then epilogue! See what going back to school does to me? I get more time for writing (which is weird) and post two chapters in two days! Anyways. This chapter starts in Sam's POV. Then Dean's. Also, the moment we've been waiting for! Dean and Cas get a little freaky! (This is my first time ever writing smut so I apologize ahead of time, and off the deep end I go. Sorry mom) Enjoy!

It had been two weeks since the hunt in Oklahoma and Sam was starting to worry about Dean. Cas hadn’t been back since that night. Dean had taken to moping around all day and drinking all night. He didn’t want to go on any hunts. He just wanted to lie around and get drunk. Sam didn’t know how much more he could take. Even Charlie, who had decided to stick with the boys, was getting annoyed with him.

It was the two days into the week when Sam finally decided he’d had enough of Dean’s moping. He still was keeping his own room at motels so Sam marched over to his room and pounded on the door.

“Dean, open the door!” he yelled. He waited a few minutes and when there was no answer he pounded again.

“Dean! If you don’t open this door I will break it down!” Sam heard footsteps coming from inside the room and then Dean was opening the door.

“Whatever,” Dean said, grumpily. He looked pitiful. He had bags under his eyes his hair was sticking up in odd ways, obvious he was nursing a hangover. Sam walked in the room and slammed the door shut behind him.

“Hey! Easy man. I got a headache the size of the Grand Canyon,” he whimpered.

“I don’t care, Dean. I have had enough of this shit. What is wrong with you?” he said louder than normal. Dean walked back to his bed and pulled the duvet up around his head. He murmured something into the pillow that Sam couldn’t decipher.

“I can’t understand you with your head in the pillow,” he said bringing his voice down. Dean sat up and glared at Sam.

“I said, nothing is wrong, jackass.”

“For some odd reason, I don’t believe that,” he replied sarcastically. “I know this has got to do with Cas.”

“Well aren’t you a fucking genius.” Sam walked over to Dean’s bed and sat down.

“Come on, Dean. Stop it. What happened?”

“I’m not having this conversation with you Sammy,” he whined.

“You sure as hell are. You’ve been moping around for two weeks now, getting black out drunk every night. You’re even putting Charlie in a mood.” Sam could see Dean’s resistance breaking. He was just too strung out to keep his walls up anymore.

“I fucked up, Sammy. I fucked up real bad this time,” he said with his head in his hands.

“This has to do with what happened in Oklahoma right?” Dean nodded his head yes.“Look man, I read that note Cas left. Have you tried talking to him? Make him understand what happened?”

“I’ve tried praying to him everyday since then, Sammy! He won’t answer me. I just hope I didn’t make jump off the deep end. I knew he was struggling and I just had to let my big fucking mouth go and fuck it up! He was finally getting back to normal.”

“Look Dean, fuck, I’m no good at this either, but keep trying to talk to him. He’ll come around. Just, uh, stop fucking moping around, man. You’re bringing me down.” Dean didn’t respond, he just curled back up under the covers, so Sam took that as his cue to leave. He got off the bed and walked to the door. When he opened it, he found Charlie there, ear pressed against the wall. She jumped when it opened.

“Eavesdropping isn’t nice Charlie,” Sam said, trying to stifle a smile.

“Shut up,” she punched his arm, “I was just wondering when you’d finally break. I have to say, I’m disappointed there wasn’t any yelling.”

“I don’t know, Charlie. I have never in my entire life seen him act like that. It’s pathetic.”

"Cas, if you’re listening, next time Dean-o prays to you, please fucking answer. He is driving me and Sam nutso down here,” she said looking up at the sky. Sam hoped to God, if he was out there somewhere, that Cas listened to Charlie.

 

XoXoX

 

Dean deserved it. He knew he did. He deserved to be miserable. He fucked up and there was no going back. So, when Sam came to talk to him he tried to block out everything he was saying. No matter how many times he prayed to Cas he knew he never would come back.

Dean sat up in his bed again after Sam left and looked up to the ceiling. He told himself he’d pray one more time, and if Cas didn’t answer, he’d never do it again. He'd go back to traveling around the country, hunting with Sam and Charlie.

“Look, uh, Cas. If you’ve got your ears on, know that this is the last time I’ll do this," he paused, "I’m so sorry Cas. I need you to know that. I need you to come talk to me, man. I need to explain things to you. I know you said you didn’t want me to worry about you but I am worried. So please, please, come talk to me,” he said, looking around the room. There was nothing, no ruffle of wings, no ‘Hello, Dean’s’, nothing. Dean exhaled and grabbed the bottle of Jack that was under the bed. He twisted of the lid and held the bottle out in front of him.

“Goodbye, Cas,” he said and took a big swig. He swallowed and felt the burn go down his throat. He squeezed his eyes shut to keep them from watering, and then took another pull. It was when he opened eyes that he thought he was dreaming.

Cas was standing in the middle of the room staring at him.

“Cas?” Dean whispered, “Are you here?”

“Yes Dean. Why wouldn’t I be?” Cas asked with a tilt of his head.

“Well how about the fact that I’ve been praying to you every damn day since Oklahoma? You chose now to answer me?” He put the bottle of Jack on the nightstand and stood up from the bed. "What the fuck, man?” he half screamed.

“If you’re going to yell at me Dean then I’m just going to leave.”

“No! Wait. Please,” he begged, “I need to talk to you.”

“Then talk, Dean.”

“Uh, okay, uh. Come sit down, okay?” He said, sitting back down on the bed. Cas was hesitant at first but then did what he was told. He came and sat next to Dean, Indian style, on the bed. Dean took a deep breath before he started talking.

“Look, Cas. I said some things that day that I didn’t mean. And I, uh, I wanted to apologize. I wasn’t thinking. We, uh, I, want you here. Never doubt that Cas, ever.” He looked at Cas trying to find some sort of clue that he understood him. But he couldn’t find anything, Cas just looked back at Dean, blue eyes unwavering.

“I know I’ve been difficult lately Dean,” Cas said finally. “I am not used to most human emotions yet.”

“None of the things that have happened have been you’re fault Cas. It’s all on me. And what do you mean ‘most’ human emotions?” Dean’s heart was thumping in his chest. He knew he was on the cusp of admitting everything and the thought scared him. He didn’t know if he was ready for that. He didn’t want to be rejected and then Cas leave for good.

“I know you think that I don’t understand most things Dean, and you are right. But there was one thing that you were wrong about in your little speech to Aphrodite.”

“Enlighten me then,” Dean said.

“I do love you. If there is one thing I understand about humanity, it’s love. And Dean, I love you.” Dean couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He was sure if he could see his own face, he’d look like a fish out of water. Cas loved him? He didn’t know what to think. This had to be some kind of sick joke. There was no way Cas loved him. It just wasn’t possible. He couldn’t love him. Not the way Dean loved Cas.

“Not funny. Quite fucking with me man,” Dean said because he didn’t know what else to say.

“I am not ‘fucking with you’ Dean. I love you. You may be a, what would you say, pain in my ass, but we’ve been through a lot. And I know you don’t love me and that’s okay. But I wanted you to know before I left.” Dean closed his eyes in the middle of Cas’ speech.

“Would you just stop talking for a second?” Dean said. When he opened his eyes he saw Cas staring at him. He knew that whatever reservations he was having didn’t stand a chance. He put a hand on Cas’ face and rubbed his thumb across his cheekbone. Cas’ gasped but didn’t move.

“Dean…” Cas started but Dean just shushed him.

“Of course I love you, you idiot,” Dean whispered. Before he could stop himself, Dean pulled Cas’ mouth to his own, and they were kissing. It wasn’t hard or passion filled. It was soft and delicate. Dean filled the kiss with all the words he couldn’t say, hoping Cas got the message. Their lips moved together effortlessly and Dean wondered why he’d never done this before. All too soon, Cas broke the kiss but didn’t move away from Dean.

“Why did you say you didn’t love me then?” he breathed. Dean sat back on his heels.

“Fuck, Cas. I don’t know. I just figured you didn’t feel the same way and I didn’t want to embarrass myself. I didn’t mean a word of it, I swear. Charlie and Sam had been bugging me about all week before the fight.”

“They knew how you felt before I did?” Cas asked.

“I sure as hell didn’t tell them. They knew. How the hell they figured it out before I did is beyond me. I think it has something to do with those damn books.” For the first time in a long time, Castiel laughed. The sound made Dean so happy that he pulled Cas back to him and kissed him again. Cas wasted no time in melting into the kiss. He wrapped his arms around Dean’s waist and pulled them closer together. Dean moaned at the contact and opened his mouth and Cas took the invitation. His tongue slid against Cas’ and he reveled in the taste. He needed more. He moved his mouth along Cas’ jaw and down to the spot just behind his ear. Cas let out a low moan that made Dean smile against his neck.

“Dean…” Cas gasped.

“Mmmm…yeah Cas?” Dean moaned, sucking a mark into his neck. Cas didn’t respond, he just grabbed Dean’s shirt and pulled it over his head.

“Whoa Cas. Little feisty?” Dean laughed.

“I have been waiting a long time for this Dean,” he said, running his hands down Dean’s torso. Dean shivered and leaned into the touch but he couldn’t help but feel a little exposed. Cas was still wearing his trench coat for god sakes. Almost as if Cas could read his thoughts, there was a whoosh and they both were void of clothing.

“Not that I’m complaining Cas,” Dean breathed. Cas was working on sucking a mark into Dean chest. “But some people enjoy taking the clothes off their partner.”

“No time for that, Dean,” Cas said. Cas continued licking and kissing down Dean’s stomach. When he dipped his into his navel, Dean arched his back and let out another guttural moan. Cas smiled and hooked his fingers in the waistband of Dean’s boxers. In one fluid motion, he pulled them off his body. Dean hissed at the air hitting his skin. Sitting back on his heels, Cas’ eyes roamed over Dean’s entire body.

“You’re beautiful, Dean.” Dean chuckled and pulled Cas’ head back to his own and kissed him. He moved his hands around Cas’ hips and flipped their positions. Cas was now underneath Dean.

“Gonna make you feel good, Cas,” he whispered against his lips. In a similar way to Cas, Dean licked and nipped his way down his body. He stopped when he got to Cas’ right nipple and sucked into his mouth. Cas let out a groan of approval.

“Ya like that, Cas?” Dean asked. Cas moaned again and nodded his head yes. While Dean moved over to the other nipple, he worked off Cas’ boxers. He continued his ministrations down and then stopped just above Cas’ dick.

“Dean…don’t stop,” Cas whined. Dean smiled but diverted his direction and kissed up the inside of his thigh. He was going to take this nice and slow; Dean didn’t want to waste a second. But Cas wasn’t having that, he thrust upward, in search of some sort of friction.

“Easy there tiger,” Dean laughed above him.

“Need you, Dean,” Cas moaned. And come one, no one could argue with that. Dean took all of Cas into his mouth, his tongue running along the underside of his shaft. He had told Cas’ hips down with his hands to keep him from bucking up. He felt one of Cas’ hands tangle in to his hair. God if that didn’t send even more shocks down his spine. He removed one his hands from Cas’ hips and brought it down to cup his balls.

“D-dean…I…I...” Cas gasped. With a few more bobs of his head, Cas came hot and hard down Dean’s throat. He swallowed the last drop and Dean kissed back Cas’ body and planted a final kiss on his mouth. He took Cas’ post-orgasm haze to his advantage and licked into his mouth. Cas’ hand trailed down Dean’s back and then squeezed his ass. In turn causing Dean to thrust into Cas’ thigh. He moaned into Cas’ mouth.

“Lie on your back Dean,’ Cas instructed.

“Don’t worry about me, Cas. ‘M okay.” Cas didn’t listen to him and used all the strength he could muster to push Dean down on the bed. He wrapped his hand around Dean’s leaking cock and moved it up and down.

“Gah…fuck, Cas.” Dean thought he heard Cas say something, but he was too lost in the sensation of Cas’ hand on his dick. He focused on the wonderful things he was doing to it. He twisted the sheets in his hands and threw his head back against the pillow. Dean felt the warm sensation low in his belly and knew it was almost over. Cas lips were on his again and that’s all it took to send him over the edge. Come splattered on his stomach. Cas rolled to the side and nuzzled into Dean’s neck.

“Wow, Cas. That was…” Dean said gasping for air.

“Yeah,” Cas murmured. Dean reached onto the floor for his t-shirt and cleaned up his stomach. Then he pulled the duvet up around them and wrapped his arm around Cas’ waist.

“Dean Winchester are you cuddling me?” Cas half laughed.

“Don’t ruin it Cas,” he yawned, his post-orgasm haze making him sleepy. “Go to sleep.”

“I don’t need sleep, Dean.”

“Then shut up and let me sleep.” Cas adjusted his body to get more comfortable.

“Dean…you kept it?” Dean propped himself up on his elbow to see what the hell Cas was talking about. He had pulled out the bumblebee pillow from under Dean’s bigger pillow. He was holding it out in front of him.

“Oh…uh. Yeah. It didn’t feel right throwing it away,” Dean said, nuzzling back into Cas' back. Cas turned his body so he could kiss Dean.

“Thank you, Dean,” he said and then he turned back around. It took a few minutes but Dean fell into an easy sleep, happier than he’s been in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry but one conversation and everything is fixed? I don't think so! Our boys still got some Shit with a capital S to get through, hence why there is another chapter! But happy endings are among us! Now I really don't know when the next chapter will be up. I am aiming for no later than next Wednesday but then again it could be up tomorrow. Who knows. Leave me some feedback. Thank you all so much! :)


	9. Happy Endings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our boys finally get the happy ending they deserve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is it! The final chapter! It sure has been a ride! An epilogue will follow this but as far as plot goes, this is it! Also, sorry it took me so long to update, I was just having a hard time finishing this. I didn't want it to end! This chapter is short compared to others but it really was just tying up loose ends. Enjoy!

The next morning Dean strutted into Sam and Charlie’s room. He had a huge smile across his face. He sauntered over to where Charlie was sitting on the couch and ruffled her hair.

“Morning guys,” he said cheerily. Sam and Charlie glanced back and forth between each other. Sam shrugged his shoulders. indicating he had no idea what had gotten into his brother. He crossed his arms and sat in the armchair next to them. Charlie looked back at Dean, trying to put the pieces together.

“You got laid last night, didn’t you?” she asked when she understood what had happened. No one is that cheery at 8 a.m.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Charlie,” he replied, turning on the TV.

“Uh huh. I call bullshit Dean Winchester.” Dean laughed under his breath and tried to ignore her. He was happy at the moment and didn’t want to talk about it and risk ruining his mood. So, he focused his attention on the TV screen. Dr. Sexy was trying to diagnose a patient. But, all good things must come to and end. Charlie and Sam were not taking well to his avoidance technique.

“He did get laid Charlie, look at him,” Sam snorted. Dean gave him the finger.

“Bite me, Sam.” “Who was it Dean? I’d like to meet them if they've got you smiling for the first time weeks.”

“Hello, Sam.” In the blink of an eye, Castiel was standing in the small motel room. His hair was a mess and his trench coat rumpled on his body. Sam looked at Dean but Dean averted his eyes and kept flipping through channels.

“Hey, Cas. Nice to see you,” Sam said with a light smile.

“Dean, I would like to speak with you…alone,” said Cas. He looking pointedly at Charlie and Sam.

“Uh…yeah, right! Charlie and I are just gonna, uh, go grab some breakfast! See ya!” Sam said quickly. He pulled Charlie up off the couch and out the door.

“What’s up Cas?” Dean asked, turning his body to face Cas. He walked over to Dean and sat next to him on the couch. Their thighs were pressed together. For the first time, Dean didn’t feel weird about it. This was right.

“What happened last night…everything you said…was that true?”

“I’m not sure if you know this about me Cas. I don’t tend to tell my best friends I’m in love with them and not mean it,” he said sarcastically.

“I’m being serious Dean.”

“So am I Cas. Look, I have no idea what I’m doing here, man. Every time I get close to someone the die or worse. This is new territory for me. But I wasn’t lying. And it scares the hell out of me, but I can’t lie to you or myself anymore.” Dean grabbed Cas’ hand and held it in his. There comes a point where you have to stop hiding and Dean realized that this was that point. Sure, he’s tried to be happy before and it didn’t work out. But everything was finally slowing down. He’s done so much for this world he deserved a little happiness for once, right? And if that meant hunting with Sam and Charlie, so be it, as long as he had Cas too.

Cas smiled down at their hands. He seemed like he’d accepted Dean’s answer. But Dean had to be one hundred percent sure he understood what this all entailed.

“I need you to understand Cas. It’s not going to be perfect. We’re both still pretty messed up. But I…I want this. I want you.” Cas leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss to Dean’s lips. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against Dean’s.

“I understand. I want this too, Dean. I love you.” That was all the assurance he needed. Dean kissed him again.

“I love you too, Cas.”

 

XoXo

 

Sam and Charlie got back from wherever they went to get breakfast not too long after. Dean and Cas were sitting comfortably on the couch watching TV. Sam didn’t want to pry into what happened while they were gone. Charlie, was a different story. All she could talk about while they were gone was Dean and Cas. She wondered if they were together, if Dean had finally pulled his head out of his ass. That didn’t mean Sam wasn’t curious either. When Charlie started questioning them, he didn’t stop her.

“So Dean, what did you guys talk about?” Dean knew what she was trying to do, but he didn’t want to let her off that easy. He might as well torture her a little bit.

“Oh you know, we talked about the migrating patterns of bees,” he said with a laugh.

“Come on Dean. I need details. Obviously you two worked whatever it is out. This is the first time I’ve seen Cas in weeks. Cas? You wanna tell me?” Cas’ eyes darted to Dean’s, obviously unsure of what to say. Dean chuckled and patted him on the thigh.

“Look, I’m not giving you any gory details. Trust me, you don’t want to know everything,” he started. “For the sake of you two though, I’ll give you the short story. We worked out our shit, yes, in an athletic way I might add,” Cas’ cheeks burned red at that. "We aren’t putting any labels on this or anything but yeah. I guess you could say we’re together.” Dean felt good to finally be able to come clean about everything. He had no more secrets and that felt pretty damn good. Charlie seemed thrilled by his revelation. She jumped into Dean’s arms to give him a hug. Sam clapped him on the back, brandishing his own smile.

“I’m happy for you guys. Really,” he said.

“I’m happy for me too,” Cas deadpanned. Dean laughed and pulled him in for a quick kiss.

“Oh ugh. Come on Dean. That doesn’t mean I wanna see that,” Sam whined, hiding his eyes.

“Get used to it Sammy,” Dean beamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all who have gave this kudos and left me comments! They helped me get to writing when I really wasn't feeling it. I'm sad to see this story go, but excited to start something new! The epilogue will be up in the next few days! 
> 
> I'm casanddeanwinchesternovak on tumblr so if you have and ideas for prompts for anything you'd like to see me write go ahead and just ask me on there!
> 
> UPDATE: I'm going to be going through and editing the chapters. The plot isn't going to change, just some grammar and other thing that need touched up :)
> 
> UPDATE again... : I've edited all the chapters! I'm working on the epilogue now :)


	10. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The story ends here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's been fun. As a birthday present to myself I am uploading the epilogue. For the last time (with this story anyway) enjoy!

Dean walked through the front door carrying bags of groceries. It had been a year since he and Cas had gotten together. He couldn’t be happier. As a group they four of them decided to slow down on the hunting. They all pitched in and bought a small loft together. It wasn’t easy. They had their struggles and they didn’t completely stop hunting. In fact, Sam and Charlie were hunting a wendigo a few towns over.

Dean walked into the kitchen and set the bags on the counter. He only just started unpacking them when he felt a pair arms wrap around his waist. He let his head fall back on Cas’ shoulder.

“Hello to you too,” he said.

“I’m glad you’re home.”

“Oh really?” Dean smiled. Cas responded by running his hands down Dean’s stomach, palming his ever-hardening cock.

“Mmm, Cas.” He turned around to face Cas and planted a kiss on his lips.

“Let’s go up to bed, Dean,” Cas whispered. Dean couldn’t move fast enough, leaving the groceries abandoned on the counter.

 

XoXo

 

Sam and Charlie got back to the loft later that night. The groceries were put away but Dean had to toss the ice cream because it had melted.

“That sucker is toast!” exclaimed Charlie as she walked through the door.

“She was awesome out there Dean! You should’ve seen her,” Sam said. Dean looked at Cas, who was sitting next to him on the couch. He smiled at him brightly.

“Good for you Charlie. But I am pretty sure I had a better weekend than the two of you.”

Cas squeezed his hand. Both Charlie and Sam smiled and sat in front of the couch. Dean flipped on the TV and an old episode of Dr. Sexy was playing. Cas nestled into Dean’s shoulder and got comfortable. Dean looked at his small family and smiled. After all he’s been through, if this was what he got in the end. Then it was worth it.

 

End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you all so much for sticking with this story. It's not my absolute best work but with more practice I hope to get better! 
> 
> Send me some prompts on my tumblr ( casanddeanwinchesternovak ) so i can get some ideas of what to do next!


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